Two Sixes Down And One More To Go...

Sunday pass midnight of blah blah...

I do envy my boss. He's gifted with the talent to lie to himself on almost anything.

When someone screws him over, i tell him to screw them back... but he manage to tell himself that everything is fine and continues to work his ass off. Thats some super power that i do not possess.

I suck at it.

On another note... im confused. Ok, thats nothing new. But yeah... i am. 

How should i handle that situation? Do i wanna handle it or not? I dont know. Its probably dejavu. Maybe.

Monday morning of empty office after final match...

A:    and making friends with younger girls actually makes me feel out of place

i'm just saying i'm joining your group jek

single men our age group

in general la

say u wanna find a partner, then ppl our age group are usually attached or married

so no choice have to find younger ones

but younger ones they think we're too old for them

thinks we're creepy

  me:    well

younger ones thinks that we are creeps... unless we can flash some wealth

yea... old guys with money are husband material.

old guys without money are creeps

  A:    fuck that's true

  A:    sad shit

Monday noon of what is....

I went to an island and did absolutely nothing but bumming around the pool.

So i took the time to figure out this age-old question; "What is the meaning of life?"

Based on experience.... i guess i roughly figured it out already.

Its all about affordability.

Yes. You taught me that.

Friday evening of no plans to follow, no one to see, nothing....

I keep reading this for few days now and wish that the world is as beautiful as this...
http://www.givesmehope.com

sigh. i have lost my mind... and i dont intend to find it back.

Monday evening of 'the meaning of struggle'

66 says (7:56 PM):
 maybe we dont have the time to value life.
 cuz we just wanna make money
 thats all we care about
X says (7:57 PM):
 but one thing
 we are not like the westerners
 their money is big
66 says (7:57 PM):
 cuz we dont have social security?

X says (7:58 PM):
 and they dun have to work hard to earn a comfortabe living
 our money is small, and everyone have to work so hard to survie
66 says (7:58 PM):
 yeah... they can be comfortable... so they have time to think bout all these mou waai yeh
 but then again... its actually the same

 66 says (7:59 PM):
 when i was studying in perth.... lotsa gwaizai and gwai mui were actually not rich
 they take bus to school.... no handphone...
 only the asians drive sports cars to uni
X says (8:00 PM):
 yeah
66 says (8:00 PM):
 and we are not struggling to survive... those indons and myanmar workers are....
we are struggling for luxury

tuesday late evening of sitting in the office alone and pointlessly...

dont really feel like drinking.
i just wanna sit in office... and i wish tomorrow comes in a blink of an eye so i dont have to leave my seat just to go get dinner or go home or whatever shit.
no. im not a workaholic. i just prefer to be working than to be doin anything else right at this moment.

was talking to richard, my uni friend. i found this old picture i took when we were studying on perth. everything was much more simple back then. and he asked me ' why 3 of us still like that?'
3 of use... meaning me, him and another fella,kumkit.... graduated and now... i dunno how to describe.
richard married with 2 kids... now jobless... sorta doin his own wedding photography thing.
kumkit married with no kids... struggling with his design company.
me... nothing. jaded. bitter. sorta suicidal... in a zen way.
the true question is, 'why am i still like that?'
cuz im naive? trusted the wrong people? i have no fuckin idea.

anyways... who cares. in the end, there's nothing left but ashes.

Tuesday evening of bullshit...

J says (2:22 PM):
 yo
66 says (2:28 PM):
 supp nigga
J says (2:28 PM):
 the nigga is poisoned
J  says (2:29 PM):
 seduced by a sexy jezebel of a guitar
66 says (2:29 PM):
 wtf
 seduced by a guitar
J  says (2:29 PM):
 ya man u read that right
66 says (2:29 PM):
 damn u potential gay
J  says (2:29 PM):
 'seduced'
 i tell u if i have this guitar
 i can kau lui left and right just by plucking note by note
J says (2:30 PM):
 that's how good it sounds
66 says (2:33 PM):
 yeah....
J  says (2:33 PM):
 aiya not everyone is a chick magnet like you okay
66 says (2:33 PM):
 thats right... girls are interested in talents... not fancy cars and diamond rings...
J says (2:33 PM):
 some people need props like guitars
66 says (2:34 PM):
 dude... clearly u are living in the 60s
J says (2:34 PM):
 lol
 yeah man
 60s
 anyway nowadays chicks don't need to depend on you also
 they only want a man for
 companionship
 lonely nights
 lurveeeeeeee
 and sex of course
66 says (2:34 PM):
 they dont... but they want u to have money. period!
J says (2:35 PM):
 chewaaaa ... period!
J  says (2:36 PM):
 so i'm doomed for singledom with my sexy guitar
 nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
66 says (2:36 PM):
 yea... u may as well name your sexy guitar Lucy
J  says (2:37 PM):
 dowan la
 Lucy sounds too close to Lulu
 i want to name her like that Latina babe in dexter
 then i can play spanish flamencos on it
 YEE HA
 Lyla
 smokin
66 says (2:38 PM):
 and spend your lonely retirement sitting on your rocking chair, in the belcony of your 20th floor apartment.... half naked and play your last song before u say goodbye to this fucked up world and jump off.
 Who's the latina babe?
 head of the dexter's police dept?
J  says (2:39 PM):
 hello the one who sets fire to everything
 and then gets cut off by dester
66 says (2:39 PM):
 dude.... thats another sign u dont know shit bout chicks...
J  says (2:39 PM):
 one man's chick is another man's chicken
66 says (2:39 PM):
 thats a brit chick
J  says (2:40 PM):
 she looks hot latina-ish to me
66 says (2:40 PM):
 she speaks brit english
J  says (2:40 PM):
 i bet she has latina blood
66 says (2:40 PM):
 latina chick is the head of dept
 no man... she's brit.
J says (2:40 PM):
 that one is not a chick but a michelin
66 says (2:41 PM):
 exactly.
 so.... i guess you'd better buy that guitar and hold on to 'her'...
 LOL
J says (2:41 PM):
 dam
 u r such a balloon burster
66 says (2:42 PM):
I know!!

Thursday sometime of 'do i look like i give a shit?'

Yesterday i went out at night with my bro... and as we were walking, i heard someone called me. But i didnt respond to it. I just walked like nothing happened. Then i got a phonecall which i ignored as well...
After that i got a SMS saying that she saw a person that looked like me walking pass.... which i didnt bother to reply.
Yes. Me is asshole and i dont see why not? You tell me...why the fuck not?
So the next day she MSN me....

june says (12:32 PM):
 wai
66 says (12:32 PM):
 yeah
june says (12:32 PM):
 y no answer my call yesterda 
 not even reply my sms
66 says (12:33 PM):
 my phone is not for answering calls
june says (12:33 PM):
 then
66 says (12:34 PM):
 its for my own convenience... if i wanna call anyone... or call police
june says (12:35 PM):
 but r u at SS 15 at that time
66 says (12:35 PM):
 yea
june says (12:36 PM):
 u r goint to Asia Cafe direction rite
 but u also not reply my sms
66 says (12:37 PM):
 myphone got problem
 cant hear
 so i dont bother
june says (12:37 PM):
 sms also cant
june says (12:38 PM):
 u tipu la
66 says (12:38 PM):
 u used my phone before ?
66 says (12:39 PM):
 or you think that im the kindda pussy guy who keeps checking his phone for sms... in case got lenglui sms me? Hhaahha
june says (12:39 PM):
 u said cant hear but u also said for ur own convenience.. means can answer la rite
66 says (12:40 PM):
 my own convenience... meaning... if i wanna call someone... i take out my phone and call.
 that is... if i wanna use my phone.

june says (12:42 PM):
 i'm angry lio
june says (12:43 PM):
 i have a very very "inche" friend
 
66 says (12:43 PM):
 inche? whats that?
66 says (12:44 PM):
 u mean 'chuin'
june says (12:44 PM):
 ya\
66 says (12:44 PM):
 which is me
 i know.... hahahha
 why friends have to be nice?
june says (12:45 PM):
 ur friends used to call u what name
 not Kian Kai rite
66 says (12:45 PM):
 this is what i would call....selling point.
june says (12:45 PM):
  is respect
66 says (12:45 PM):
 if u have a bunch of lame friends who are good and nice.....   anyone of them die also u wont feel anything...cuz they are just the same robotic replica
june says (12:46 PM):
 no
66 says (12:46 PM):
 me.... im unique.... in a bad way... but so what. hahhahaa
june says (12:46 PM):
 nonononono
66 says (12:47 PM):
 im just an asshole kindda friend..... u ask tun yen, kin chuen they all
 the old me is already gone....
 hahahahhaha
66 says (12:48 PM):
 how unfortunate.. hahha
june says (12:49 PM):
 hei
june says (12:50 PM):
 muntah lio
66 says (12:50 PM):
 cool huh
 well... now im gonna go grab some lunch...
june says (12:51 PM):
 k
 taqke care
66 says (12:53 PM):
 nah... im just gonna go take some lunch

friday wee morning of binge drinkin weekend...

So yeah... finally goin somewhere this year. Land of the duty-free alco.... more like an island... in the country.
It good i guess. I dont even wanna remember when was the last time that i've been there, which i of course still remember and wish that i didnt. Fuck it.

The alco will save me from my fears....

Sunday evening of doin time...

By doin time... i mean prison time.
I have not gone out all day yesterday. Feels pretty shitty.
Today.... yeah, i havent gone out also. Feels terrible. Just sitting in front of my pc watching DSP playing video game on youtube.
No smoke. No drink. Just youtube. Shit.

Wanna get out... no where to go. The pub is not open. Dammit!